Those talks made me realize how much I miss my best friends. I don’t talk to them as often as I want because we’re all so busy with school and life. But just know that I’m here if and when you ever need me. Thank you for always opening my eyes to things I don’t see. Thank you for helping me understand myself better. Thank you for being in my life because without you guys, I don’t know how I would ever get through anything.
I won’t treat my next relationship in the same way as my past. I won’t intentionally sabotage my own relationship. I’ve done it, without even knowing. I’d find some “flaw” that person had and end it right away. I won’t be looking for my next relationship to fail. I’ll make it work. I’ll try. I see now that I’m to blame for my past actions. I won’t lie, my first relationship really fucked me up. And the ones after just added to that since I didn’t grow and mature as I wanted to. I have a lot to learn, there’s no doubt about that. But the fact that I’m finally acknowledging what I’ve been doing, I feel as though I have a chance next time.